Traffic law(lessness) in Cambodia

Traffic law(lessness) is a curious thing in Cambodia. We are constantly doing things wrong. But now, thanks to the English translation of the rare "Cambodian Traffic Law Booklet", we have been able to correct our erroneous behaviour.


Traffic lights: The beautiful colours designed for spectator entertainment. If you are lucky you might see one change colour. Stopping to observe colour change awards you good luck in your next life. Stopping in not compulsory.

White line in middle of road: A reminder of general direction to travel along roads, lines are to be followed. They are not (as some countries would like us to believe) there to divide traffic. You may use as much road as you need into oncoming traffic.

Zebra crossings: A very nice pattern, don't you think. We used up the excess paint making these because we saw some on American TV. Tourists may attempt to cross the road on our nice patterns. This doesn't mean you have to slow down or stop. Maintain speed and dodge the crazy big nose. They have mental problems.

Vehicle indicators: A design fault that affects every modern vehicle, indicator use is on individual choice. Having beautiful buzzing, noises is highly recommended, as this hypnotizes big noses and makes them spend more. Tunes are even better. They make mentally ill big noses seek you for their journey and tip you in (USD).

Merging with the main traffic flow: Not really sure what it means. Some foreign idea. Maybe about coming out of side road. If coming out of side road, don’t look at anyone; remain in your own little world. Other traffic is sure to slow or stop to avoid you. May the force be with you.

Traffic flow: Never heard of it, So just drive where you want, when you want, if a jam is caused by your 10-point turn just smile.

Speed signs: We think the French left these behind. They make interesting reading and a great tool for practicing numbers in foreign languages. They are in no way related to traffic speed. Please ignore.

Recommended traffic speed: Driving as slow as possible in your highest gear indicates to the world how wonderful a person you are. We recommend strongly each individual decides his or her preferred speed. Road + footpaths: Where roads become jammed, footpaths are an easy alternative, as footpaths are to be viewed as a small road anyway. Pedestrians have no right of way when vehicles use small roads (footpaths).

Accidents: Everyone is expected to watch those who have crashed. We prefer all other vehicle users to stop and form as large a crowed as possible. Where big noses are involved, money is to be demanded immediately regardless of fault.

Horns: On the spot fines are now being given to owners whose horns don't work. It is compulsory to test your horn every 30 seconds to avoid fines. They also make an interesting sound that keeps passengers awake.

Finally please remember not to pay attention or look at any other traffic when driving then you don't have to worry about it and you will be happier.


Observing these simple rules will hopefully help you to avoid the mistakes we have made, should you find yourself in Cambodia.