Lijiang and Mama's

We arrived in lovely Lijiang on Tuesday the 22nd of March, just in time to extend our China visas which expired the next day (phew!).

Lijiang's old town is very picturesque, with beautiful old buildings and little streams criss-crossing the paths and running along beside the houses. However, every single shop in the old town sells either tourist crap, clothes, shoes or it's a restaurant... and it's choking with Chinese tour groups! It's really funny seeing all the tour guides walk along with their flags held high, and a gaggle of Chinese tourists obediently following behind, wearing their matching baseball caps. At night, they all converge on bar street (which Tim assures me, was NOT there four years ago) and have singing competitions with each other from one side of the street to the other... absolute chaos, but fun to watch!

Lijiang is criss crossed by rivers filled with gold fish.

The cobbled lanes of Lijiang with their tourist crap.

An unbeatable combination of cherry blossoms and Chinese lanterns.

A good a place as any to get down to the serious business of Chinese checkers.

We had several recommendations from travellers in Chengdu to stay in Mama's guesthouse when we get to Lijiang (one guy even went so far as to call it the best guesthouse in China!). They were full of praise about how awesome and cheap it was, and when they spoke about Mama, their eye glazed over as they retold how much she fed you and how sweet she was.

The only trick now is... how do we find it?! Mama's guesthouse is hidden away in a quiet corner of the old town, but thankfully she provides a great service where you can call Mama from anywhere in Lijiang and she will come and get you.

After a half-baked attempt to find the guesthouse on our own (via a warm beer), I was lucky enough to make the call to Mama (who endearingly, refers to herself in the third person). This is basically how the conversation went:

Me: "Ni hao?"
Mama: "Hello?"
Me: "Hello, we have just arrived in Lijiang, and we would like to stay with you."
Mama: "Hello?"
Me: "Yes, hello?"
Mama: "Hello? Mama here"
Me: "Hello Mama. Where is your guesthouse?"
Mama: "Mama.... where are you?"
(oh good, we're getting somewhere)
Me: "OK, we are near Misu Misu bar in the old town."
Mama: "Hello?"
Me: "Yes, hello? Can you hear me?"
Mama: "Police come there"
Me: "What?"
Mama: "Hello?"
Me: "What?"
Mama: "Police come get you"
Me: "Police?"
Mama: "Hello?"
(at this point, Tim was giving me this 'what's happening' look, and I gave him a 'I have no idea' look in return)
Mama: "Hello? Mama come get you!"
Me: "OK! OK, we will wait here."
Mama: "Hello? Police wait there." Then she hung up the phone.

Not one minute later though, she called back and spoke to the owners of the store that we were calling from, and they gave the phone back to me.
Me: "Ni hau"
Mama: "Hello?"
Me: "Hello Mama"
Mama: "One moment police"
Me: "OK" Then she hung up the phone. At least she knew where we were now.

Before I knew it, the store owners were passing the phone back to me again... it was Mama.
Me: "Hello?"
Mama: "Hello? One moment police, Mama come get you"
Me: "OK, we wait here"
Mama: "One moment police"

So, being pretty positive that Mama knew where we were now, we went into the bar for another beer while we waited. I spotted Mama in the crowd instantly... we even waved at each other through the bar window. She is an elderly Chinese woman with a warm face and a ready smile, and she bustled into the bar with one of her daughters/helpers and tried to take our 18 kilo bags off us.

As she was leading us through the maze of laneways, Mama asked us where we were from, then proclaimed that "now Mama have four Audalia's"... which I'm guessing meant that there were already another couple of Aussies at her guesthouse. After storing our bags in our room, Mama took Tim and I by the elbows and lead us to a table with four other travellers already seated and eating dinner. Pointing to one of the couples, and then at us, Mama proclaimed, "Two Audalia, two Audalia... four Audalia's" and sat us down. Bless her, she wanted us to sit next to someone that we had something in common with.

If that wasn't the nicest introduction to a new town I've ever had, we then found out why people's eyes really glazed over... dinner at Mama's. For 8 kwai per head (not per dish), Mama will feed you until you explode with such a variety of tasty dishes my mouth is salivating as I write this. And she won't stop either... not even if you say you're full (this means nothing to Mama), she will only stop when there are at least 3 untouched dishes of food on the table. Breakfast is very similar. It only cost 2 kwai for the thick bread, fried egg and sliced tomato feast, which of course she keeps adding to until you plead with her to stop... and then she'll give you another portion of sliced tomato. If you don't escape from Mama's domain in time for afternoon tea, Mama will feed you more food (usually a banana and a piece of bread with tomato) and tea for free. We watched one Israeli guy tell Mama he didn't want any banana, and Mama wouldn't listen... she wouldn't have a bar of it, and forced it onto him ("Eat!"). Bless her.

At night, Tim and I would sit up drinking cheap beer with the other guests at Mama's - it has such a great vibe there. And of course, it's always entertaining to hear Mama have an almost identical struggle with the English language over the phone to some other helpless traveller trying to find her.

It truly is the best guesthouse in China, and it's made our stay in Lijiang so enjoyable that we hardly notice how touristy it is. The best thing about it... it's not in the LP guide. :)

"Way...?"